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Date:	2007-04-06 09:59
Subject:	NCLEX-PN Results
Security:	Public
Mood:	jubilant

I AM A NURSE... an LPN to be exact..... wooo hoooo..... wait a minute, now I need a job! LOL

Date:	2007-04-05 11:49
Subject:	NCLEX-PN
Security:	Public
Mood:	nauseated

Okay, well that was the WORST hour of my life. I sat and stared at so many questions and thought how the HELL am I supposed to know this??? Although I will say the couple I can remember that I looked up since I got home I got two right, one wrong, that's not too bad, I guess.

It shut off after 85 questions, which is the minimum, so I either did really well or really badly.... I know, I know EVERYONE who takes this supposedly feels like they failed, that doesn't make me feel any better.... I had to pull over twice on the way home to throw up just because I was so upset.

It's honestly a blur at this point. It was horrible. I mean, beyond absolutely horrible. There were questions on their that were so obscure.... I didn't get a SINGLE math question, I got a ton of drug questions on specific side effects and food interactions that I simply don't remember, it was horrible. Have I said yet that it was HORRIBLE???

I most probably will be my school of nursing's first student to fail this damned thing. It was absolutely awful.

I've been studying my mind out for this test... it's called the HESI PN. (PN stands for practical nurse)

While I finish my RN program (graduate in less than 8 months!) I really need to be an LPN instead of a unit secretary. It's anywhere from $5-$10 an hour more.

To be an LPN I need to take the state boards... the NCLEX-PN.

In order for my school to sign for me to take the NCLEX-PN, I have to get a 900 or above on the HESI PN. (This test predicts how well you would do on the NCLEX if you took it with the same level of knowledge.) Essentially, they aren't going to let anyone mess up their NCLEX pass rate by taking it when they aren't prepared for it.

And, if you don't pass the HESI with a 900 the first time, it doesn't matter how well you do on it another time.... the school still won't sign for you to take the NCLEX. No second chances.

So.... 900 is the goal....

AND I GOT A 1053!!!!!!!

God is SO good!

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better ! If I already know you well, expect the questions may be a little more intimate! *
3. You WILL update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

apers interviewed me.
1. How does the way your parents raised you effect how you raise your children?
I want my children to remember that no matter how busy life got I was never too busy to hug or kiss them.

I know that the world will beat my children down soon enough, I want them to know that mom is the one person who always thinks they are wonderful.

When something is important to my children, I will be there.

No matter what my children want to do or become, I will support them in their endeavors. I will never put down their dreams, no matter how silly they may seem. (This was true even when Jon's goal in life was to become "An astronaut or a butterfly." sigh... luckily, we realized it was when the MSN Butterfly was a commercial and he just wanted to be the guy who knew everything. Now he wants to be a doctor. I work with doctors. I know this means he wants to be someone who thinks he knows everything! JK)

I want my children to see me as the person who builds them up, not the person who knocks them down.

Up until a few years ago I would have said that meant I wanted to be a parent like my dad, not my mom. Now I know I have to be a parent like myself... since my dad is now following my mom right off the cliff...

2. How did you meet your husband?
Don't laugh... I met him on EHarmony before it started advertising... back when it was only known through channels like Focus on the Family and other Christian organizations. Actually, a lady at church recommended it! I was privileged to meet several very nice people but the very first time I even spoke to Marc on the phone I knew... as did he...

He was in New Jersey, I was in Arizona... he got in his truck THAT WEEK and drove across country.... only to get a flat tire on the side of the freeway at the off ramp to the street I live on! (He was less than half a mile away). So... our first actual in person meeting was on the side of the freeway whil he fixed his flat tire and I walked his dog!

That probably would have happened faster if we hadn't spent more time trying to stare at the other person without getting caught staring!

3. When you were a teen, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be a pediatrician. Then I wanted to be a nanny. I wanted to attend the Royal Academy of Nursing and Nannying in London (I think that's what it was called, that was a long time ago) but my dad didn't want me so far away. Then I got a job offer to be a nanny in Germany, but my dad didn't want me so far away. WHY is that the only time in my life I have ever listened to my parents????

Now I want to be a developmental pediatric nurse practitioner. Guess I haven't changed too much....

4. Did you always want a big family? If so when did you realise it, and if not what changed?

I can't remember not wanting a big family. My dad's brother and his wife have 11 children. All of them were older than me... the closest in age is almost 4 years older than I am. We had infrequent visits when I was a child but I always remember the closeness. Also, my best friend was Mormon, the second of a large family. I spent as much time at her home as I could. Her mom was just about the best mom ever and I still love her very much.

My house, by contrast, was quiet and I remember always feeling lonely.

My thought processes became more concrete, however, when I started working in the ICU. Every time I saw an elderly person in hospital who had only one or two children, the children always seemed stressed and stretched trying to be there for mom and dad and take care of their own teenage children and lives. However, every time I saw a family with six, eight, or more children, there was always someone to be there with mom or dad and everyone else picked up the slack and shared the work of keeping all the families running.

I decided that the greatest gift I can give my children is each other.

5. What is your very favorite part of attending a birth?
It starts when mom looks at dad and "gives up"... she stops trying to be in control of the process and lets her body take over. (This is especially good if she and dad have attended classes that have let them know this is going to happen. My classes, for example! LOL)

At that point, right after she completely gives up, you know baby is almost there... after giving in, mom receives a new sense of confidence... not in herself, but in her body and in the process. She is able to refocus on the pushing... and you begin to see a head emerge.

Again, mom tends to lose faith that it will ever stop (and it doesn't matter if you push for one minute or for one hour, it is a moment that hangs for an eternity and then is over in the blink of an eye) and an almost universal exclamation after we announce that baby is out is "Really?".....

And then it happens. Mom and dad stare at this new person, and then they look at each other... and that look has more love than either one ever knew existed in this world.

THAT is the part of attending births I love the most. Watching the baby get born is beautiful. But watching parents get born is amazing.

Mom had surgery. Not major surgery, but surgery nonetheless (she had to be put all the way under with general anesthesia), and she's almost 68, and her health has not been the best lately.

So, yesterday she had surgery.

Tonight she wants to take the kids to the theater. And of course, she thinks I'm saying no just to be a jerk.

I'm so glad I'm spending $30,000 on nursing school so that she can ignore me. My dad obviously agrees with me but is scared spitless to say so to her.

You know, if I had tried whining and saying, "You're just trying to be mean", which is essentially the routine she's giving me, I would have been grounded!!

Okay, this one seems mildly depressing... but I absolutely LOVE this song... maybe I can convince hubby I need to get this CD for my birthday.

She never slows down
She doesn't know why but,
She knows that when
Shes all alone, it feels
Like its all, coming down
She won't turn around
The shadows are long
And she fears if she cries
That first tear
The tears will not stop
Raining down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when its all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

She won't make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself
And the fears whispering
If she stands, she'll fall down
She wants to be found
The only way out is through
Everything she's running from
Wants to give up and lie down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when its all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when its all crashing down
Stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day whats lost can be found

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when its all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won't drown
And one day whats lost can be found
You stand in the rain

Well the day has just begun and I'm already running late
With too many irons in the fire and too much on my plate
I'd be pulling out my hair if I could just get one hand free
And I'd stop this world if I could find the key

What I see is telling me I'm going crazy, but
What is real says God's still on his throne
What I need is to remember one thing
That the lord of the gentle breeze is lord of the rough and tumble
And he is king of the jungle yes he is

People say this world's a jungle and sometimes I must admit
I'd be scared to death if I did not know who was king of it
But the truth is God created this whole world with his own hand
So everything is under his command

What I see is telling me I'm going crazy, but
What is real says God's still on his throne
What I need is to remember one thing
That the lord of the gentle breeze is lord of the rough and tumble
And he is king of the jungle yes he is

K-i-n-g of the j-u-n-g-l-e
He is the king of creation
K-i-n-g of the j-u-n-g-l-e
Ruler of the earth and sky and the sea
K-i-n-g of the j-u-n-g-l-e
He's always in control
He is the king of kings

What I see is telling me I'm going crazy, but
What is real says God's still on his throne
What I need is to remember one thing
That the lord of the gentle breeze is lord of the rough and tumble
And he is king of the jungle yes he is

Date:	2007-01-25 14:21
Subject:	FINAL GRADE FOR MEDICAL-SURGICAL NURSING
Security:	Public
Mood:	ecstatic

Yay! I got a 98.7% on my med-surg final and got an A in the class!

My husband will no doubt say, "I told you that you didn't have to worry about that!" But you know what, I was worried! So, yes, doing the happy dance right now.

Today in my pediatric clinicals I am giving a presentation on Autism Spectrum Disorder.

I don't know if all of you know my son, Joey.

Joey was born on May 8th, 1996. My best friend Jeanie was there.... And after three hours of labor, about 10 minutes of pushing, this precious little guy was born.

Joey was an amazing baby. He crawled at 2 months. When he was four months old I took something (I don't even remember what now!) away from him and put it on the bookshelf. He crawled around the living room for 20 minutes, pulling pillows off of the couches and chairs. He pushed them over to the bookshelf and tried to crawl up them to get it back! Needless to say, Joey has never been what anyone would consider a "normal" child.

When Joey was six months old, his pediatrician walked into the room to find him putting together an 8 piece jigsaw puzzle. Her assessment of him was that he was "scary smart".

Here's Joey at age 2 months.


When Joey was 15 months old he had a high fever. This fever was in response to an allergic reaction to his MMRs.

Please understand... I am not pro-vaccination. I am not anti-vaccination. There are important benefits and risks to all vaccinations. I AM pro-information. All parents should understand those risks and benefits and be able to make an informed decision for their children.

Through my research I have come to believe that there are children who are more susceptible to vaccine side-effects than others. Even the most conventional of doctors understands that there are children who are allergic to some vaccines... just as some children are allergic to bee-stings... or strawberries.

This is Joey at age 4. Note the lack of eye contact.



When Joey was diagnosed, it was a relief. Now I had some understanding of what was going on. With the help of some wonderful people at the Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential, Alison (then age 5) and I began an intensive crawling/repatterning program with then aged 2 Joey.

These were the years we referred to as "losing Joey to the 'Dark Side'".

Around age 6, Joey was moved up the spectrum to Aspergers. Now at age 10, he is considered mildly developmentally delayed, possible sensory integration disorder. He is about as high up the spectrum as you can get and still be on it.

This was Joey this morning... age 10:



Yes, he does that to his hair on purpose. He thinks it's "cool". Considering what his father just did to HIS hair, I can't complain too much.

Not to mention, I have a beautiful, happy boy who can look me in the eyes and tell me he loves me. Despite his other (mild) delays, I couldn't be happier.

New information has come out regarding the potential causes of Autism Spectrum Disorders. The latest research seems to indicate that there are parts of our brain called "mirror neurons". They allow us to read other people's actions and intentions. It is also what allows us to empathize with others and to learn from watching others. In children with Autism Spectrum Disorders, these mirror neurons are either missing (congenital Autism) or damaged (Autism spectrum disorders developed post-birth).

There is also research indicating that children with ASD have a sort of auto-immune response to their own brain tissue. Perhaps this is what causes the damage to the mirror neurons.

Also, there is some linkage between ASD and ADHD. I have ADHD. Alison has ADHD. Jonathan has ADD. Perhaps Joey was just mean to have ADHD before the brain inflammation damaged enough mirror neurons. I know that the repatterning we did under the guidance of IAHP is what allowed Joey to rebuild connections in his brain... and it was done when he was young enough and his brain was still "plastic" enough to build those connections. Maybe it's not the mirror neurons themselves that are damaged in all cases... maybe it's just the connections between them and the rest of the brain. I don't know.

In addition, the synapses in ASD children do not have the same myelination as "normal" (boy, do I hate that term - I understand why some people in autism reseach call them neurotypical instead) children. Without proper myelination, the neurons that are there cannot fire properly.

Also, children with ASD do not learn well from watching others. They have to physically do something for their mirror nuerons to fire and allow them to learn. Marc used this last week when he realized Joey didn't understand how to peel the carrots from watching him do it... He put his hands on Joey's hands and peeled a carrot together with him. After that, Joey could do it perfectly.

This is why I am becoming a nurse. Because I remember people telling me that Joey should be institutionalized. I remember that pain.... and knowing that locked inside my little guy was a brilliant, bright, happy child. And I know that other children are out there whose parents don't know how to unlock their children...

Over the past few weeks I have determined that after I finish my RN to BSN at Rush University I will get my Family and Pediatric Nurse Practitioner licenses and finish up with a child development doctorate at the Erikson Institute in Chicago.

I am going to be in school forever....